Flowers in the Valley

 "I'm having vibes of a mom who's just given birth to a new baby," said one Nigerian brother as he looked at me and Mariama lying side by side in the hospital bed, the dome mosquito net unzipped to welcome our visitors.  The fact is, Mariama was born in this clinic 11 years ago, and today marks 2 weeks since she got very ill, resulting in an emergency surgery on Monday, October 19th surrounded by the people that welcomed her into the world.  Sitting with her in the hospital as she recovers, brings back a lot of those first feelings of a mother so in love with her girl that it hurts and thankful tears overflow.  She said today, "When I saw you and daddy here next to my bed this morning, I realized, "This used to be it! Just the three of us.""   Right, sweet girl, you made us a mommy and a daddy. 

 

Heading in to the surgery. Mariama is on my back. She couldn't walk because of pain and being so tired and unsteady.

 I would not have chosen to stand outside an operating room in Jos, Nigeria, wondering what the doctors were going to find when they opened up the stomach of my first born who hadn't been able to eat for over a week.  But the sweetness of this time with my baby, the closeness of God and his people as they are praying all over the world has stirred something that had become dormant.  I feel my heart has expanded again to embrace the grace that accompanies the lying down of control (Which I never had anyway) and experience a stillness in the chaos, the promised "peace that passes all understanding." As I did when my twins were born 9 weeks early, I have had to say over and over, GOD is good, God IS good, God is GOOD. 

 

 

Mariama doing her best to smile because she sat up for the first time since the surgery when she was just thirsty and tired.

Mariama and I have a theme song for this time which we listen to with our eyes closed multiple times a day, tears welling.  It's called "Flowers" by Samantha Ebert. The chorus says this:

"So I brought it up in a desperate prayer
Lord, why are you keeping me here?
Then He said to me,
"Child I'm planting seeds
I'm a good God
and I have a good plan
So trust that I'm holding a watering can
And someday you'll see
That flowers grow in the valley"

 The rest of our family left for retreat today, our annual retreat that we look forward to all year.  The grief of missing this event is very real, but so is the closeness we feel as we struggle to train the bladder, start drinking fluids again, and maybe taking some light solids tomorrow.  We have finished two books together, had countless people visit and pray with us, experienced divine intervention and timing, witnessed God providing the qualified professions needed, seen doctors across the ocean rally to help us navigate this hard time, and sweet fellowship with Jesus. 

 Those "vibes" are felt because this mom feels like she's had a new birth, re-discovering the beauty of motherhood at the crossroads of pain.  So thankful that God is planting seeds that will blossom to make valleys spring to colorful life.  May it be so, may it be so. 

Today when the NG tube was finally taken out! 

 

Glory and Flowers

 

I sat on a rock, overlooking a pond created by a lake.  I looked down to my left and saw this flower, delicate, intricate, hidden.  Surprised by a God who would put such beauty in such a hidden place, I thanked him for the gift of seeing.  My friend, Janel, had been reading "The Weight of Glory" by C.S. Lewis on this retreat, and the quote she read to me returned:

 "There are no ordinary people, you have never talked to a mere mortal...But our merriment must be of that kind (and it is, in fact, the merriest kind) which exists between people who have, from the outset, taken each other seriously - no flippancy, no superiority, no presumption.”  

 This luxurious expression of God's glory and creativity could have grown, bloomed, and died without anyone ever seeing it, and it would have fulfilled it's very purpose, to display and please the Creator.  That being so, I am convicted of two true things: 

 1.  If my whole existence is wrapped up in catching the child jumping into my arms and returning her cuddles, giving her worth and affirming the glorious person she is, taking her seriously, then I have done well. 

2. She, this blooming flower, matters. She, and every small or big person that God has put in every corner of his beautiful world is an expression of his glory and it matters not if anyone knows their name or their existence, because they exist in their perfectly created state to bring joy to their Creator.  My role in this perfect order is to see, affirm and rejoice in every blossom that I have the privilege to behold.

 

I am especially reminded of this on today, October 15, when my little sister, Leah Watkin, is turning 41.  Her beauty is unparalleled and I'm so thankful for the invaluable lessons on the importance of one soul that I've learned from being her sister.  It's actually hard to NOT take Leah "seriously," as C.S. Lewis says. Her extraordinary ability to see and accept a person without  justification of their worthiness of that gift has made me tender to others and to my Creator.  She is a flower that has bloomed in one corner and change her world, changed my world. I am deeply grateful I have had the joy of beholding her. 

YouVersion

My favorite Bible app simply is called “Bible” on my home screen. You can search for it by the name YouVersion. I’ve been using the app for years and appreciate how it usually is getting better each year. It does sometimes take some steps backwards, but mostly I’ve appreciated the active development.



One thing I appreciate about the YouVersion Bible app is how easy it makes it to read and listen to the Bible in many different translations not only in English but in many other languages. Sadly, although it has thousands of languages on it, it doesn’t have my favorite Hausa language version yet. Still, I believe it has over 100 Nigerian languages (praise God!), some with the Audio. The only thing holding YouVersion back are copyright issues—they would gladly host more languages if they just had the permission. I don’t know what has kept them from getting permission for every language in the world. Thankfully there are other apps out there, so most (though not all) translations of Nigerian languages are now available in one app or another. 


The YouVersion app makes comparing translations of a verse or set of verses really easy. I just long press a verse, select additional verses, and then choose the “compare” option to see many translations side by side. If I want to see the context in another translation, I just touch it and there I am. The verses I selected are highlighted, and I can see all that comes before and goes after. I usually have two or three English translations, Nigerian Pidgin, and Hausa available just a touch away. When I read in different languages (and in different translations of English) the same verse may strike me differently, catching my attention—and sometimes grabbing my heart.

YouVersion also lets me highlight verses and make comments. I have had some issues with connectivity losing some comments, so now I mostly use the “copy verse(s)” feature and paste into my prayer journal for further prayer and reflection. Please join me in thanking God for a versatile multilingual easy-to-use Bible app!

Although I enjoy reading the Bible on my phone, I enjoy it even more when the phone reads to me. That’s something I’ll explore more next time in another feature of YouVersion.

By the way, starting on Sunday (Sep 27 - Oct 3) you can join believers around the world in a week of prayer for BIble translation using a YouVersion Devotional plan: Bible Translation: A 7-day Journey of Prayer for the Nations. If you are reading this later, you can probably also do this plan any week that works well for you.

Holding You and No Other In My Heart

"I love my life to count

And to know I've made an impact somehow

But Lord, I want you more

And I want to work and achieve

To enjoy the comfort it brings to me

But still, I want you more

Lord, I want you more 

(Chorus)

At the end of the day

It'll be your face I see

When I've finished running my race

I will be falling at your feet

Singing You've been worth it all

You are worth it all. - Song: Lord I Love You More by Eliza King 

 

A dance drama where I played the role of the first translators in a language.

When we got married in the elegant pillared sanctuary in Holland, MI fourteen years ago, I said the words, "holding you and no other in my heart 'til death do us part." It's the part of the vows that I could NOT utter in the pre-wedding, rushing out of the church sobbing, my sister and maid of honor in hot pursuit.  What is it about those words?  The hymn that says, "prone to wonder Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love" also gets me teary every time.  Saying those words to my hopeful, tenderhearted groom held so much weight!  Was I doubting my love for him?  My devotion? My longing to walk with him until "death do us part?" No.  It's as someone said to me before I got engaged when I was confused and questioning, "Christy, you will always grieve something. Your singlehood and the freedom that has given you, or the possibility of being married and having a family."  It's like we choose our grief.  I tell my little third culture kids, "We say "goodbye" a lot, yes, but we also say "hello" a lot!"  It was more than that though, fear gripped me that I may not be able to be faithful to those words, knowing how distracted, undisciplined, and recklessly spontaneous I can be. What if, before God and his body I committed to doing what I wanted to, but would fail to do? 

All week, multiple times daily I have listened to this song , "Lord, I Love You More" as it acknowledges the joy being known, loving a family, having a home, and having an impact in the world and then declares that it doesn't matter as much as Jesus.   I was part of the generation that sang "Seize the Day"  and Jim Elliot's poem sung by Twila Paris' "He is No Fool" and Steven Green's "The Mission"  that was called to go to the world and make a difference!  I came to Africa because I wanted my life to count, and then I read the lyrics of "Lord, I love you more", "I want to make an impact somehow, but Lord I want you more," and I ask myself "Is that true?"  If marriage is a reflection of the follower's relationship with the Rabbi and the statement "holding you and no other in my heart" is true of me, then the mission, the seizing of this day, cannot be foremost or it will replace the Love (and Author) of my life.  I listen to this song, and pray desperately that he will replace any love for anything or anyone that is greater than himself.  Especially ministry,  impact, and relevance, idols that vie for my attention.  

Because someday I WILL fall at his feet, with you, and I want to declare that it was ALL done with my eyes fixed, my wandering heart stayed and sealed declaring, "He's been worth it all,  I have held him and no other in my heart."

Holiday Orange Hat Closing Program

 

 

Focus Mode

One great reason to set my phone aside is all the possible distractions it can bring. Sometimes I think, “let me just handle this urgent request, then I’ll focus”. Messages, bank transfers, even games and puzzles could be just a tap away. Sometimes as a director (or even as a father) my role can feel a bit like a doctor—like I should always be on call. But the reality is I can “switch off” and be unreachable so I can focus and pray. I even have a quarterly practice of slipping away for a whole work day to pray, switching off from the world to focus on God. Thank God for an organization that values time spent in prayer! But how do I do that if I am using a Bible app on my phone?

I’m grateful that most phones now include a feature called “focus mode”. Both iPhones and Android have them. Older phones had two separate features “Do not disturb” and “Focus mode” and I had to put them both on as needed. My newest phone combines them in a feature called “Modes and routines”.

Focus mode in an Android phone

“Do not disturb” completely silences the phone. It won’t even vibrate or show pop up notifications. Later I can look through missed calls and messages to catch up on anything that was urgent. Since I often forget to put my phone’s ringer back on, I use an Android app called Simple Silent timer that puts it back on after a given time frame, or I use the timer of the “Do not disturb” feature.

“Focus mode” switches off any apps I don’t need to study the Word of God. It doesn’t switch off the phone and messaging app, unless it turns on the “Do not disturb” feature. Every other app appears gray and won’t open until focus mode is switched off. The concept is simple but profoundly helpful. It's like not having the rest of my phone, just the Bible library.

My new phone allows me to make “Focus mode” come on at specific times or when I open certain apps. At first I thought it would be useful to have this mode come on whenever I open my Bible app, but that turned out to be really inconvenient rather than helpful. I sometimes use my Bible app at work, and it surprised me when it shut down useful apps I was using to do my work. Now, I just use the timer to automatically put on “Focus mode” at the time when I usually have a quiet time. At other times, I can put on the focus mode for a set period of time, perhaps thirty minutes or an hour. Thank God for the peace when all the other apps turn grey and I’m alone with God and his Word.

If you need help, don’t hesitate to contact us; we don’t get overwhelmed with people reaching out to us. This is often tucked away in settings but can be set up as a quick access setting with just a single swipe and a and tap or two to turn it on. You may find directions online on how to put on Focus mode in iPhone—note the section on “Choose a customized…Home Screen page to switch to while the Focus is on to help limit distractions”—and a few versions of Android: Samsung, Redmi/Xiaomi, Oppo, and others, you may also consider Google’s instructions. Frankly, searching an AI engine with your model may give you the easiest directions, but if the AI hallucinates and gives directions that don’t work, ask for links to directions in places where you are stuck.

No app

Over the coming months I will share some of my favorite Bible apps. But first I want to share a non-app. This year my wife and my colleague John Sacson have inspired me to read through the Bible the “old fashioned” way. I have a physical study Bible that she bought for me about ten years ago. I decided to read through it in a year. I’m not going to quite make it through in a year, but I’m enjoying the overview. I just read the text, not the footnotes. I’ve chosen different colors for different themes related to the heart and I’m highlighting them: joy, mourning, wisdom, prayer, and the heart itself. I’ve had to let go of some of my desire for order so that I can just focus on the text and let God speak through his Word. So if I misplace my highlighters, I don’t force myself to go back to the chapters gone by.

 

My study Bible

I really enjoy having a physical book in my hands, or laid out on the rug in front of me. I can easily look forwards and backwards as I read. After learning many ways to study the Bible, I’m not actually studying it this year. I just read it out loud. I’ve never done that before and I find that I like it. The emotion comes out and I find I slow down and listen better. There are some parts that are a bit shocking and I find I am reading in a whisper because the Bible sometimes tells stories that are violent or even shameful to say out loud.

Printed Bibles in many Nigerian languages are fairly accessible, though some still can not afford Bibles, especially in languages that fewer people speak, as these tend to be a little more expensive to print. Please join me for thanking God for availability to so many of the sweet printed Word, and pray that printed Bibles will be available in all the languages that his people want them here.

How do you like to read your Bible? I’d love to hear from you. The more I hear from you all, I can make this less about me and more about God and how we meet him in his Word together!

I’ve heard some people completely switch off their phone or keep it in another room when they are praying. Before I read the Bible, I use my phone for Scripture memory flashcards, so I use a different approach. I have an automatic feature that puts my phone into a focus mode during my prayer time. I’ll share about that in my next post.

Dancing the Word

I gripped my chair on the front row of the event hall while Adam and Eve reveled in the glory of God and then hid from his thunderous steps.  When the Red Sea parted, I wanted to gather myself up and join them in their victory.  The experience of dancing the Word with the 35 dancers and actors that choreographed the 40 minute drama/musical and acted the life-changing story of the Gospel from Genesis to Jesus awakened a fervor to go and share and be part of the continuing story of Jesus calling humanity to back to Eden.  We are invited back to sweet fellowship and walking with our Creator! 

 

 This group of young people are not only gifted dancers, they invited me into there community and welcomed discipleship with humility and joy. "I have always wanted to follow Jesus," one of them shared, "but I have not known how until now."  Nigeria has a history of rich faith and spirituality.  Yet many artists are wondering what following Jesus looks like for them and not are not finding  a platform to minister in the gifting that pulsate with the rhythms around them.  This unique opportunity to savor the sweetness of Jesus together, get away from the city, sit with Him, and embody the Word was transformative for us all. 

 Please pray for these treasured souls as they discover what it looks like to follow Jesus in his Way while still making their way as artists.